Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Kindergarten Dad

In the morning, around 8:25, I'll drop my five year old son off at his elementary school.  As we slowly creep forward in the drop off line, I'll begin to tell him how proud of him I am and how important I believe learning to be.  As he unbuckles his seat belt, I'll tell him how much I love him and wish him a good day.  He'll smile and say, "I love you too, Dad," and then he'll jump out.  I'll watch him walk away with his backpack over his shoulders, hanging over half the length of his body.  His tennis shoes will show underneath, looking too big for his spindly legs.  If the last 10 days are any indication, my eyes will well up (you know how these Oklahoma allergies can be).

For the last five years, my wife and I have kept him in something of a bubble of love.  I guess the moment a child exits the safety of the womb, insulated from the world, we try to rebuild a womb of a different sort.  This second womb we usually call "home."  Over the last five years, we have loved him best we know how.  We have tried to instill the values we hold most dear.  We have attempted to create an atmosphere of peace and joy, where he could flourish as a human being.  For the last five years, we have tried to protect him from all that would harm him and nourish him with all he needs to grow and mature.  And yet, just a couple of weeks ago, we experienced the birth pangs of Kindergarten.  Suddenly, he was forced into this strange new world while we were needing epidurals.

Now, I trust my five year old son to a teacher I have barely met and a school I haven't spent more than one hour in.  I find myself praying for public school teachers and administrators in a way I never have before.  I'm trusting one of God's greatest gifts to them, for 7 hours every day, as are all the other young families in my zip code.

Every day, when I watch him walk into the building, I'm reminded of how dependent we all are upon each other.  If he turns out to be a person of character and a responsible citizen, it will be because MANY people have shaped him:  extended family, school teachers, coaches, friends, Sunday School teachers...  The truth is that NONE of us have gotten where we are in life on our own; NONE of us raise our children on our own; NONE of us make it in life on our own.  Much of the rampant individualism and over-privatization we hear about today is just the great myth that each of us is the captain of our own destiny and an island unto ourself.  For the life of me I can't understand why so many people draw such impermeable boundaries between "family values" and "social justice."  The moment I drop my kid off at school, what's good for family and what's good for society seems to collapse into one.

Every day, when I watch him walk into the building, I begin to wonder if anyone he will bump into that day will recognize how important and invaluable he is to me.  He's my son.  Then again, he goes to school with other people's sons and daughters who feel the same way.  Come to think of it, everyone I bump into at the grocery store, Starbucks, or Jiffy Lube is someone's son or daughter.

So I guess what I'm saying is- be nice to one another.  Whether you are at an elementary school or somewhere else- just be nice to one another.  All of us need each other, and everyone you run into today is someone's child.  As of two weeks ago, the person you bump into might just be mine.  Now if I could just get my allergies under control!      

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